Walk
336. Your Friends
Matter to God!
From
“Times Square Church Pulpit Series” by David Wilkerson – September 14, 1998
(Scripture
quotes are in King James Version)
Who do you name as your closest friends? Believe
it or not, this question is a matter of great concern to the Lord. And that’s
because your friendships speak loudly both to God and to the world about the
condition of your heart.
Have you ever thought to
pray, Lord, what do you think of my friendships? Are they pleasing to you or do
they displease you? The fact is, a
righteous friend can provide a link to the blessing and favor of God, because
he encourages you toward a godly lifestyle. On the other hand, an unrighteous
friend can be a binding chain to every kind of evil, leading you into terrible
bondages.
As I use the word friend
throughout this message, I’m not referring to immediate family members, such as
a spouse, parent or child. My definition of a friend here is someone with whom
you are closely associated, one in whom you naturally confide. In short, a friend is someone with whom
you walk, talk and bare your soul.
Of course, you probably
have various circles of friends. You have a business circle, which includes
your coworkers, partners or clients. And you have a social circle, including
those people you associate with on a surface level. You may also have contact
with ungodly acquaintances. The apostle Paul says it’s impossible for us to
avoid these kinds of contacts, otherwise, we’d have to leave the world
altogether!
Yet the circle of friends
God cares about most is your intimate circle, your bosom pals. These are the
people you love most, and who have an influence in your life. You’re naturally
attracted to one another, and you agree on most things so you feel safe opening
your heart to each other. In short, you have an affinity with one another.
Our hearts are
constantly sending out signals, messages that attract in others what is deepest
in us. I’ve seen this truth powerfully illustrated in our congregation at Times
Square Church. For instance, a lustful, sensual woman may walk into a service
for the first time and look around the sanctuary. Within minutes, she’ll make a
connection with every man in the congregation who has a roving eye. Her very
character sends out signals that attract like hearts.
During one service, I
watched in amazement as a connection was made between two young drug addicts.
One of them had dropped out of our rehab program, never having let go of his
cocaine habit. As he sat in our congregation, he studied every face and soon he
made a connection with another struggling addict. After the service, I saw the two young men walking down the
street together, talking secretively. There had been an unholy attraction, and
their spirits connected!
On the other hand, I
once observed with interest a godly seminary student who was attending our
services. I wondered whom this young man might find as a friend. Then one night
after a service, I saw him talking with two other very devoted believers.
Something about this young man had attracted those godly people, and the signal
was caught!
Now, the Bible tells us
we are not to be ignorant concerning Satan’s seductions. And one of the devil’s
most common attacks against us is to bring into our inner circle of friends
someone who’s under deception, an agent of hell, who’s on a mission to destroy
us. Satan uses this ploy especially with lonely or compassionate Christians. He
tries to turn an undiscerning person’s kindness into an affinity with an evil
spirit!
I once had a minister
friend who’d been delivered from a drinking problem years earlier. Somehow he
developed a close friendship with a pastor who lived hundreds of miles away, a
man who had never been delivered from his own alcoholism. The two began
conducting revival meetings together and sharing each other’s burdens. And soon
this other preacher convinced my friend there was no evil in drinking
moderately. He seduced my friend back to drinking and within a short while,
both men became alcoholics, lost their churches and ended up on the streets of
New Orleans.
I believe the devil sent
this drinking man into my friend’s life. Satan knew he couldn’t get to him any
other way so he brought into his life a supposed friend, to destroy him!
Let Me Show You From the Scriptures What
Happens When a Godly Person Joins an Affinity With an Unrighteous Friend!
King Jehoshaphat was a righteous man who ruled
over Judah when the kingdom of Israel was divided. This man’s heart was fully
set on God, and he was blessed and honored above all others in his generation:
“And the Lord was with Jehoshaphat, because he walked in the first ways of his
father David…” (2 Chronicles 17:3).
Yet, scripture says,
Jehoshaphat joined an affinity with evil King Ahab, who ruled the northern
kingdom of Israel: “Now Jehoshaphat had riches and honour in abundance, and
joined affinity with Ahab” (18:1). The Bible says of Ahab, “...(he) did more to
provoke the Lord God of Israel to anger than all the kings of Israel that were
before him” (1 Kings 16:33).
You may wonder, how could
a righteous king like Jehoshaphat end up joined in affinity with such an
ungodly man? I believe there is only one reason for this unholy alliance: It
was part of a satanic plot to destroy the righteous Jehoshaphat!
You see, Jehoshaphat had purged the
land, driving out all the idols of Baal and slaying the idolatrous prophets.
Yet Ahab’s wicked wife, Jezebel, worshiped Baal and she knew what Jehoshaphat
had done to her idols. So she set her sights to bring down this godly man!
Jezebel devised a plot with
her wicked daughter, Athaliah, to infiltrate Jehoshaphat’s godly court. Soon
young Athaliah met Jehoshaphat’s son, Jehoram and she used all her feminine
charms to win his heart. The plan worked: Jehoram decided to marry Athaliah and
he went to his father to ask for his blessing. Foolishly, Jehoshaphat granted
it.
When scripture says
Jehoshaphat joined an affinity with Ahab, it means they were joined by
marriage. The devil must have
danced with glee at this union! Now Jehoshaphat would have constant contact
with the wicked Ahab and be subjected to the charms of his wicked daughter.
Simply put, evil had entered Jehoshaphat’s inner circle!
Eventually, when
Jehoshaphat died, Jehoram took the throne, and Jezebel began calling the shots.
The nation quickly returned to idolatry. And Jehoram even ended up killing his
six brothers. Yet, this was only the beginning of the bloodshed spilled
throughout Judah.
And it all happened
because Jehoshaphat allowed himself to join an affinity with an ungodly man.
The tragedy is, he didn’t have to. You see, it would have been impossible for
Jehoram to marry Athaliah without his approval. Why didn’t Jehoshaphat tell his
son, “This woman you love is full of idolatry, she’s in rebellion against the
Lord! She’ll only give you evil counsel and turn you away from God. I’m telling
you, Jehoram, drop this relationship right now, before it destroys you!” Instead, Jehoshaphat never said
anything.
In addition, Jehoshaphat
had the scriptures available to him, in which David stated very clearly:
“Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor
standeth in the way of sinners, nor sitteth in the seat of the scornful” (Psalm
1:1). “I am a companion of all
them that fear thee, and of them that keep thy precepts” (119:63). Jehoshaphat
knew all this, yet still he wouldn’t take a stand!
Jehoram and Athaliah’s
marriage produced a son named Ahaziah, who took the throne at age forty-two.
The Bible says of this man, “He also walked in the ways of the house of Ahab:
for his mother was his counselor to do wickedly” (2 Chronicles 22:2-3).
Suddenly, Athaliah was the court counselor in Judah. And scripture says this
evil woman “…destroyed all the seed royal of the house of Judah” (verse 10).
I’m convinced this had
been Satan’s plan all along to destroy the godly seed of Judah! You see, this
was the lineage of David, and the scriptures prophesied that from this lineage
the messiah would come.
Beloved, you can be sure
the devil would try everything he could to cut off the seed of Christ.
Likewise, if you’re a follower of Jesus, if you’re now in the blood lineage of
Christ, Satan will try to bring into your life someone to destroy everything
godly in you!
Let Me Tell You How You Can Know Whether
Satan Has Planted One of His Agents as a Friend to You!
Right now, you may be thinking, “Wait a minute,
I don’t want to start doubting my friends. I don’t want to suddenly become
suspicious of them.” My answer to
you is, if they’re true friends, if they’re knit to your heart in the Spirit of
Christ, you have nothing to fear in examining your relationships with them. And
you’d better look at all your friendships in the light of scripture, or you
could lose your very soul!
It’s easy to determine
whether your close friendships are of God, or if they’ve been planted by the
enemy to destroy you. Simply think
of your best friend, and then answer these questions:
· Does your friend gossip,
backbite or speak evil of others?
· Is he argumentative
about scripture, a continual debater, never coming to truth?
· Does he call godly
people Pharisees?
· Do you detect in his
words a spirit of disobedience, envy or suspicion?
· Does he spew out
poisonous words against his (or her) spouse?
· Has he succeeded in
planting unkind thoughts in your mind about others?
· Have you begun to join
him in spewing out bitterness?
If your friend fits this
description, and you’re being drawn farther away from Jesus because of this
friendship, you can know the devil has planted that person in your life. He has
the spirit of Ahab and he’s been sent to destroy the work of Christ in you!
On the other hand, a
true, godly friend will always take the side of God’s word in any matter, and
not just your side because you’re friends. Such a friend won’t counsel you in
the bitterness of sin. Instead, he’ll love you enough to tell you the truth.
Let me show you what
happens to every child of God who joins an affinity with a bitter, unrighteous
person. There are three awful consequences:
1. You’ll Be Drawn
Into Somebody Else’s War or Problems to Your Own Regret!
The Bible tells us
Jehoshaphat’s kingdom had been peaceful up to this point: “The fear of the Lord
fell upon all the kingdoms of the lands that were round about Judah, so that
they made no war against Jehoshaphat” (2 Chronicles 17:10). Judah was blessed and prospered
abundantly, and nobody dared come against them.
But after Jehoshaphat
joined an affinity with Ahab, scripture says, “…Ahab… persuaded him
(Jehoshaphat) to go up with him to Ramothgilead. …And he answered him, I am as
thou art, and my people as thy people; and we will be with thee in the war”
(18:2-3). Jehoshaphat willingly got sucked into a hopeless war, one that God
had no part in! The Hebrew word
for ‘persuaded’ in this passage means ‘a soothing seduction.’ Jehoshaphat allowed himself to be
seduced into war by Ahab, answering, “I am as you are.” In other words: “I’m your friend, so
I’m with you all the way. I won’t let you down. You can count on me!”
Is your close friend
full of bitterness, hatred, anger and pursuing a war of some kind? Is he
involved in a marriage war, a family war, a personal war? And are you like a
Jehoshaphat to him, offering help and encouragement? If so, look out, you’re
about to be seduced into it all!
That’s right, very soon
you’ll find yourself smack in the middle of your friend’s mess, and you’ll be
asked to take a stand. If your friend is in a troubled marriage, for example,
you’re going to be forced to take a side. And you’ll end up sympathizing with
him, all the way through his divorce!
Beware, Christian, whenever you extend comfort or encouragement to
someone who’s in rebellion, you take sides against the Holy Ghost. And that
makes you a partaker in that person’s sin. Tragically, when Jehoshaphat joined
Ahab’s war, he only hastened his friend along the path of destruction!
2. You’ll End Up
Ignoring All Prophetic Warnings and Scriptural Counsel!
Recently, a woman came
to me after leaving her husband. She looked me straight in the eye and said,
“God spoke clearly to me. He told me I had to leave my husband, because he had
something better for me than this marriage.” Tragically, this woman’s best
friend received the same word from the Lord, and encouraged her to divorce!
If you have an ungodly
friend in your inner circle, he’ll give you all the reassurances you want, even
if you’re in error. In fact, Satan will fill your head with the voices of false
prophets, all claiming to speak truth. They’ll say, “Go ahead, everything’s all
right. God is behind you.” But
they’ll lead you to very the brink of destruction!
I’m sure Jehoshaphat was
convinced he was acting righteously when he pledged to join Ahab in war. In
fact, scripture says, “Jehoshaphat said unto the king of Israel, Enquire, I
pray thee, at the word of the Lord to day” (2 Chronicles 18:4). He said, “Let’s
ask the Lord for his word on the matter. We won’t act until we hear from him!”
So Ahab called on his
four hundred false prophets: “…And they said, Go up; for God will deliver it
into the king’s hand” (verse 5). All four hundred voices agreed: “It’s okay to
go to war. God is with you!”
But Jehoshaphat wasn’t
convinced. He asked Ahab, “Is there not here a prophet of the Lord besides,
that we might enquire of him?” (verse 6). Jehoshaphat wanted a man he knew was
holy. So Ahab sent for the prophet Micaiah, who had been jailed for speaking
truth. When Micaiah showed up on
the scene, this fearless man mocked everything that had taken place. He even
prophesied Ahab’s death, saying, “…I did see all Israel scattered upon the
mountains, as sheep that have no shepherd…” (verse 16). He was saying, “You’re
going to die in battle, Ahab. And God’s people will be scattered over the
hills!”
God made his word to
Jehoshaphat and Ahab clear, leaving no doubt as to what he thought about the
whole affair: “It’s doomed! Go at your own risk. Nothing but death and defeat
await you on the battlefield!”
At this point,
Jehoshaphat seemed willing to obey a true prophetic word. He appeared to want
to do everything God told him. Yet, for centuries, theologians have marveled at
what happened next: When the clear word came, Jehoshaphat ignored it!
Micaiah seemed to sense
Jehoshaphat’s reluctance to obey. And he ended his warning with these words:
“…Hearken, all ye people” (verse 27). I believe Micaiah was looking directly at
King Jehoshaphat and saying, “You, sir, heed my word! This is all a demonic
deception. It can only end in destruction! Can’t you see your friendship with Ahab is all wrong? He’s
an idolater! Please, don’t listen to all these lying voices.” Yet, incredibly, the very next verse
reads: “So the king of Israel and Jehoshaphat the king of Judah went up to
Ramothgilead” (verse 28). Jehoshaphat marched off to war with Ahab totally
ignoring God’s warning!
Beloved, you can boast all you want
about loving God’s word and wanting to obey it. But if you don’t break away
from the deception of ungodly friends and seek Holy Ghost discernment, you’ll
end up ignoring God’s word!
You may accompany your
friend in his war but when the chips are down, he’ll hand you over to the enemy.
That’s just what happened to Jehoshaphat, when he went to war with Ahab. The
evil king set up Jehoshaphat to be killed: He told him to dress in his kingly
robes, while Ahab himself dressed as a soldier. That way, Ahab reasoned, the
Assyrians would go after Jehoshaphat instead of himself.
Ironically, Ahab was
killed by an arrow that pierced him through a tiny slot in his armor. And
suddenly, Jehoshaphat was surrounded by enemy soldiers, who were ready to cut
him to pieces. The king knew he was facing death, and he cried out to God for
help. Scripture tells us, “…and the Lord helped him; and God moved them to
depart from him” (verse 31).
The war was a disaster,
just as Micaiah had prophesied.
Israel’s army fled in disarray, like sheep without a shepherd. And
Jehoshaphat retreated to Jerusalem, his friend Ahab dead and his armies
defeated. It was only by God’s grace he escaped death!
I can imagine the
thoughts that must have raced through Jehoshaphat’s mind as he hurried back to
Jerusalem: “Oh, God, thank you for delivering me! Now I see the danger of
walking with an ungodly companion. Never again, Lord! I won’t be a part of that
worldly system anymore. It’s all over now!”
But it wasn’t all over.
God still had a controversy with this man!
3. The Last and Most
Tragic Consequence of Affinity With An Evil Friend Is God’s Wrath Upon You!
As Jehoshaphat was on his way home, the
Lord sent a prophet out to meet him, with these strong words: “Jehu the son of
Hanani the seer went out to meet him, and said to king Jehoshaphat, Shouldest
thou help the ungodly, and love them that hate the Lord? Therefore is wrath
upon thee from before the Lord” (2 Chronicles 19:2). God was saying to
Jehoshaphat, “You don’t know the danger and consequences of what you’ve done.
You may think it’s a light thing to join an affinity with someone who’s against
me. Ahab was my enemy, an idolater, and you made friends with him. You listened to his wicked talk and
indulged his filth. Yet you didn’t take a stand against any of it, Jehoshaphat.
I have a controversy with you about this!”
At this point, you may
be thinking. I understand that Ahab was evil. But as I consider my own friends,
there’s no way I can think of them as God’s enemies. Yet, consider these passages from scripture:
· “He that is not with me
is against me…” (Luke 11:23). Does your friend take the Lord’s side in all
things?
· “Rebellion is as the sin
of witchcraft…” (1 Samuel 15:23). Is your friend’s counsel full of
rebellion?
· “…he that condemneth the
just… (is an) abomination to the Lord” (Proverbs 17:15). Does your friend speak
evil of godly people?
This is not a game! Your
friends are a serious matter to God because their actions have serious
consequences: “Thou givest thy mouth to evil, and thy tongue frameth deceit.
Thou sittest and speakest against thy brother; thou slanderest… Now consider
this, ye that forget God, lest I tear you in pieces…” (Psalm 50:19-22).
Listen to the prophet
Isaiah: “For he said, Surely they are my people… in his love and in his pity he
redeemed them… But they rebelled, and vexed his holy Spirit: therefore he was
turned to be their enemy, and he fought against them” (Isaiah 63:8-10). God
actually turns against those who ignore his word!
In Jehoshaphat’s case,
God brought war and trouble to Judah: “It came to pass after this also, that
the children of Moab, and the children of Ammon, and with them other beside the
Ammonites, came against Jehoshaphat to battle” (2 Chronicles 20:1). Up to this
time, Judah had enjoyed great peace. But now Jehoshaphat saw enemies coming at
him from every side, threatening to destroy his kingdom!
Paul writes, “The wrath
of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of
men, who hold the truth in unrighteousness” (Romans 1:18). The apostle is
speaking here of people who know the truth yet ignore it, pretending it doesn’t
exist. Simply put, God’s wrath is upon all who suppress the truth, doing
nothing about it like King Jehoshaphat!
Thank God, scripture
says, “Jehoshaphat feared, and set himself to seek the Lord, and proclaimed a
fast throughout all Judah” (2 Chronicles 20:3). The king humbled himself and
repented: “Jehoshaphat bowed his head with his face to the ground: and all
Judah and the inhabitants of Jerusalem fell before the Lord, worshipping the
Lord” (verse 18).
God responded to
Jehoshaphat’s brokenness by giving Judah total victory against the Moabites.
Finally, the Bible says, “…the
realm of Jehoshaphat was quiet: for his God gave him rest round about” (verse
30).
Let Me Close With This Final Warning:
This matter of choosing friends wisely and
cautiously is a lifelong concern. The fact is, you may escape from one unwise
relationship but you can jump right into another!
Scripture tells us
Jehoshaphat’s story ended tragically:
“After this did Jehoshaphat king of Judah join himself with Ahaziah king
of Israel, who did very wickedly” (verse 35). Jehoshaphat did the same thing again! He joined an affinity
with evil Ahaziah, just as he’d done with Ahab.
This time God sent a
prophet to Jehoshaphat saying, “…Because thou hast joined thyself with Ahaziah,
the Lord hath broken thy works” (verse 37). God’s Spirit left this
once-righteous man because he wouldn’t obey!
Beloved, the Bible is
very clear on this matter of friendships: “Make no friendship with an angry
man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go: lest thou learn his ways, and
get a snare to thy soul” (Proverbs 22:24-25). “As for such as turn aside unto
their crooked ways, the Lord shall lead them forth with the workers of
iniquity…” (Psalm 125:5).
Take a stand today. If
you have ungodly friends in your inner circle, break them off! God in his mercy
will deliver you from the bonds of the enemy, as he did Jehoshaphat. But the
fact is, you can never stop being alert to Satan’s attempts to put someone in
your life to destroy Christ’s work in you. Pray, “Lord, open my eyes to all my friendships! Help me to
see them clearly, whether good or bad, pleasing or not pleasing to you. May all
my friendships bring glory to you!”
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