If, as the Bible tells us, that our hearts are deceitful, how can we ever really know for sure if we are in a real intimate relationship with God? So many times believers tell themselves that they are in such a relationship with God because they want so desperately to believe it.


There are levels of intimacy between humans and between God and man. We never really "arrive." We need to always be aware that there is room for intimacy to grow and progress, both with God and with our spouses.



Let us look at God’s definition of intimacy.



"Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave to his wife and they shall be [be ever becoming] one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife; and they were not ashamed" (Genesis 2:24,25).



There are four major points here in this Scripture.



1. Exclusiveness. Leaving our parents, our family, our traditions and becoming exclusive with one other being are necessary ingredients to intimacy. There are only two God ordained exclusive relationships and both of them are based upon a blood covenant. First is our relationship to the Lord and the other is our marriage relationship. The blood covenant is the only true basis for intimacy:


"It is the Spirit who gives life; the flesh profits nothing. The words that I speak to you are spirit, and they are life" (John 6:63). The Word of God is the transfer agent for the blood covenant. We are to go to the Word exclusively for all our needs. Going to our flesh or to the world is spiritual adultery.




2. Possessiveness. Cleave means to possess. We are to be possessed by God and to posses Him. We are to be possessed by our mates. There is a godly type of jealousy. We do indeed belong to God and we do indeed belong to our spouses. Obviously there is an unhealthy possessing which becomes toxic. We need to be possessed and to possess as God does it, without violating the other’s free will. We need to possess and be possessed by the Word of God. We are to be consumed by it and immersed into it.



3. Progressive. "They shall be one flesh" is an ongoing term. It is progressive. There is never an end to the process of intimacy. If it is not growing it is dying! Grow or Die!



4. Nakedness. This is being totally vulnerable with the other and trusting that one to see your imperfections without criticism. There is the absence of shame. Being transparent with the Lord, with ourselves and with others in our ordained realm of influence is important! Without this transparency with God, we have no right to assume intimacy with Him.


God wants to take the truth of our lives and process it through His marvelous Cross in order to manifest His redemption and love for us.




Larry Chkoreff December, 2000